"It's Like We're the SAME."

Yeah, I've known her since first grade. Yeah, that's about fourteen years, but who's counting? Her name's Jeanette Sinh &she's one of my closest friends. Throughout the fourteen years we've been acquainted, we've never been this close. It makes me happy. &Our parents as well. lol.

Let me tell you a little about this great young woman. She's a Libra, so she is inclined to being an idealist. However, she hides this very well. She sets the ground for realism &when she meets anyone, she'll tell them how it is. She doesn't run in circles - like most people our age - but she gets straight to the point. She's determined to push her limits &is found @Otis in all hours of the day &in the peak of night. She's focused &won't allow anyone to stand in her way. She also has a soft side - a side in which we fuse &are one in the same. She knows that when you are in a relationship, it should be wonderful. It shouldn't be about all the immaturities in life. It should be about the look. Yeah, this is the friend I've been telling you about. I can't even begin to tell you how well we see eye to eye. She is passionate &will try her hardest to be right there behind you when you need support. Nevertheless, she always has your back. She loves late-night runs for food or Yogurtland - she's an adventure-seeker. She's a Disney fanatic. She's a baaaaaad influence - she's the reason I'm a Disney fanatic now, too. She knows when to let her hair down &when to be serious. She gives a mad dogging look. She's most of my childhood embodied in a little Korean girl. Inside and out, she's absolutely adorable.

I may not be able to spend your birthday with you today, but on Friday, it's onnn. I'd like to dedicate this post to the amazing Ms. Sinh &would like to greet her a spectacular, awe-defining, beautiful birthday. Because Lord knows she deserves it.

Happy birthday, Jeanette. Live it up! ♥

Question of the Day.

Have you ever felt torn between allowing yourself to feel something toward one person versus playing the field with another?

But I guess since we're young, we shouldn't be inclined to desire a relationship nor be inclined to want to always stay single. We're young, so we shouldn't even stick to an idea of love so soon. Too early to tell. To early to predict. Don't predict. Don't make assumptions.

Right?

Barely Legal.

What is it with boys always going for the younger girls? Is it the new fad? The new trend? What is it? Is it just society's want &desire for the current Lolita? They treat girls like cars - trade them in when the new model comes around. Is it because they're shinier, faster &have a better interior? Hah, it's funny.

Butttt, maybe it's all relative. I'm a young girl, too.

Quote of the Day.

I believe in love &lust &sex &romance. I don’t want everything to add up to some perfect equation. I want mess &chaos. I want someone to go crazy out of his mind for me. I want to feel passion &heat &sweat &madness &I want Valentines &Cupids &all the rest of that crap. I want it all.

-Rose Morgan from The Mirror Has Two Faces

Sex/Love/Intensity/Passion. I want to watch this movie. [:

Quote of the Day.

Hey Stephen, I could give you fifty reasons why I should be the one you choose. All those other girls, well, they're beautiful... but would they write a song for you?

-Taylor Swift

Mmmm, I can't help myself.

Sex/Love/Intensity/Passion.

I've been molded to a rushed kind of love. Falling fast and falling apart faster. I've never been the one to end things because the passion ignites the thrill in me to venture something deeper, something more. The past relationships I've been in have never satisfied me fully. They were great, yes, but it always left me with a bad taste in my mouth. Sex complicates things. It's just the truth of the matter. I understand people who can just do it to do it, but sooner or later, the other person or that person, themselves, develop a kind of clingy complex. Feelings become involved, reciprocation does not. &We're hurt &searching all over again. I don't know, maybe it's not love that I love, but the intensity of a relationship. The connection. The attraction- the raw, original, genuine attraction. Of course, another factor comes into play: games. I don't know about you, but I hate playing these games. I understand that the chase is pivotal in the start of something, but what gets lost in it is the realness. Can't someone truly just want to get to know someone more without being this superficial LA mystery? Now, I'm not saying to let go of your heart &spill out your feelings either. There's a good balance - &maybe that right there is the game in itself. But that's all gray area.

Sex is best when it's deeper, passionate, sensual, touching, breathing, reciprocal actions, deepening, intense, with a hint of love for the insides of a person (figuratively). It's meaningful, beautiful &a gateway to the person's soul. Not the gateway, but a gateway. Ugh, this makes me sound like a total addict. I promise you I'm not - when I don't. It's great to have, do, feel, &express.

Love is sweetest when it's innocent. &After the first love, it really isn't anymore. The "sweet" part about it is the little things. The subtleties. &God knows I love the subtleties. It's a specific sort of feeling. It is found in actions. It may be found in sex, intensity &passion, but not always. There's a difference. Love, to me, is the romanticism of feelings. The giddiness, the kindness, the caring, the understanding of someone's truest &purest nature. When you find someone who satisfies this, it is signified by the look. I don't know if most of you know, but I am utterly obsessed with the look. I only have one friend who understands me fully with this. It's hard to explain. It's usually the sparks in someone's eyes that are expressed when they look @someone they truly care for. Not an empathatic or sympathetic look, but an intense, "Oh my god, this man/woman is all I can think of &see right now. &When looking @them, all my desires are fully and wonderfully quenched." Yeah, I'm getting all profound &whatnot, sue me. I don't really search for a love like this, but when I am in the midst of it, I know, understand &fully appreciate it. &To reiterate, I have not been fully satisfied through my past relationships. This love I am describing may also go for friendships, as well. &The friendships I cherish - my core - have some aspect of this love that make me fully satisfied as a whole. You can call me a puzzle, but I have most of my pieces intact. The bigger picture is known, but I know the shape of the pieces that are missing.

Intensity and passion are beautiful and rarely kept in relationships. This is usually found in the chase, or the beginning of getting to know someone. However, if this is kept, it would be a hell of a relationship. This is mostly kept in their sexual desires, which is fine. But it is best when one has their own intensity and passion for a different aspect - let's say art or music - &allows someone in to see and intertwine with it. Not become a part of it, but have an understanding of the feeling of the element they are satisfied with. I'm a Libra, so I come from the planet Venus, the planet of beauty, love and sensuality. I'm an idealist, but I know when to move in &when to create space... most of the time. I like the feel of equal effort &equal desires, which I think is wanted by most people. Settling for dullness is never an option &shouldn't be. I've never "broken hearts" because I downright tell them that they're just not satisfying me. If they push the envelope, I'll gladly change my mind. I search for specific opposite aspects of people that I can add to my balance - that I can interrogate, uplift &connect with. Everyone I keep around me has a specific je ne sais quoi that can be defined as determination for a specific thing - or for anything they still don't know yet. Knowing everything doesn't have to lead to intensity being shared between people. The process is good, too. When these details are intermingled into something as great as love or sex, the outcome is brilliant &absolutely, positively lethal.

What can I say? I wear my heart on my sleeve. ♥♥♥♥


(http://astrology.about.com/od/venus/p/VenusLibra.htm)

Two Strikes.

&You're out.

Honestly, don't fuck with me. If I don't reply back, it's not to get @you, it's to preserve the little hope of the friendship that I thought I wanted to keep. I don't want to say anything that I'd regret. So, all in all, I'm getting shit done &I need time away. It's the greatest poison out of all the carcinogens my body - my life - is already containing. No arguments here. Period.

BKL.

Yeahh he makes everything better. [: I tend to overanalyze the negative when, in fact, the whole is positive. I'm content, thank you very much. I'm not making that same mistake again. Yayyy. One point for Christia!

&

&I saw our relationship flash before my eyes. &I know that this is crazy. It's just my luck to like you. It's just my luck to fall head over heels. It's just my luck to have you. It's just my luck to have you as just a friend.

♥

Tell Me That It's Not Just Me.

Wake me up when September ends. ♥

Introducing...

Hollywood Madam ♥

Mariana R. on the violin &Christia S. on the piano &vocals. A light indie that will "flavor your senses, sweeten your disposition, ignite your imagination &nourish your dreams."

No need to look any further, we're right here.

"Blush."

An original from Mariana &Christia. Name will be TBA. Copyrighted 2009. [:
lmfao.

I swore these walls had snipers guarding them. /I swore I'd keep my mystery. /For some extraordinary reason /you had me feeling a different kind of free. /Hey hey hey, /you make me blush, blush, blush when I hear you say my name. /Blush, blush, blush &all my friends thinkin' the same. /Saying my daydreams are gettin' too ahead of me. /I can't stop my cheeks from turning mahogany.

I swear it sounds like I'm talking nonsense. /You'd swear I never knew /what butterflies were. /But honey, darling, dear, you've climbed that fence. /Hey hey hey, /you make me blush, blush, blush when you look into my eyes. /Blush, blush, blush when all the blues I see are skies. /Saying my daydeams are gettin' too ahead of me. /I can't stop my cheeks from turning mahogany.

The chemicals in my body make my heart sink /the calculus in my brain just won't let me think /These proofs of numbers can't compare /to the proof of how I feel when you run your fingers through your hair.

Hey hey hey /I make you blush, blush, blush, when I come a little nearer. /Blush, blush, blush now what you see in me is clearer. /Baby, you know you can't get me off your mind, /you seem to know that I'm that kind /

To make you blushhh. /Oh sugar it's just a crush. /All the blues I see are skies /when you look into my eyes. /They all tell me my daydreams are gettin' ahead of me. /I promise you I can't stop my cheeks from turning mahoganyyyy.
♥ [:

Quote of the Day.

Fuck the head cheerleader. I'm down.

-Mariana Ruiz

Ohhhh the blush. We live for it don't we? Don't front. hahaha.

You Don't Know My Name.

It feels like oooooooh.

What's going onnnn? I've been on hiatus, but I'm back.

"I've got birds in my ears &a devil on my shoulder."